July 2011
Anonymous asked: Pretty sure you've always wanted to see me naked.. Well.. I'm feeling pretty adventurous today so go to datelink5[dot]com (switch [dot] with .) then sign up and find my profile under the username 'lolsummer69'. I hid my face in the pictures. but I want you to guess who I am and then hit me up on Facebook lol. Good luck.
December 2010
Secret Sandwich
DAD: can u bring me my sandwich into my room? Dont tell anyone i asked you this.
DAD: please, dont tell any one. please dont tell. Please dont say anything.
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Ozo Sushi Rose
Mom: My tattoo used to look like the rose on the napkins at the Ozo sushi restaurant, until you came along and fucked it up as a fetus. You’ll have to check it out.
Twitter
Mom: I’m on twitter now. I tweet all day!
Mom: ooo laaa laaa, JLO is making chicken parm tonight. mmmm
Me: I hope this is a joke.
Mom: twitter me! everyone is following me everywhere
Survival Advice
ME: Might not make it off the GW bridge alive in this storm.
DAD: Keep windows up if you go into water remember that car will float for a min till ya roll win down and swim away
Heart Problems
Mom: 3>
Mom: damn. that didn’t work.
Mom: how do you get the three to turn around
All I Want for Christmas
andshejustlaughs:
…is to find the 40s-esque (think Andrews Sisters) version of “All I Want For Christmas Is You” that I heard in a Bath and Body Works the other day.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=274DJMrLyKA - Is this what you’re looking for? If not, it’s still a great version.
I made $500 last week, but I'm only getting $395...
missneela:
plasticteacups:
FUCK TAXES.
JFC, my taxes have never been that much. ;____;
I got a $2500 Christmas bonus and only got $1700 of it. But I genuinely love paying taxes and I’m just hoping my $800 is used for anything but defense.
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“Turn down your thermostats? Buy a smaller car? Conserve? I have spent quite a...”
– Don Blankenship, CEO of Massey Energy—the company that owns the Upper Big Branch mine that exploded in April and killed 29 coal miners. Blankenship announced his retirement last week shortly after an article in Rolling Stone called him “the embodiment of everything that’s wrong with the business and...
"Birth marks and deformities on people are...
missneela:
cultlogicforbeginners:
thebadromancer:
nothanksimgood:
So wait, if I have a phobia of clowns does that mean a clown was linked to my death in a previous life? What daa fark.
…
I have a lot of birthmarks.
How interesting.
I have a birth mark on my neck and inner-thigh………………VAMPIRES.
This is REALLY interesting.
Terrified of sharks and I have a very small birthmark...
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“They better leave Willie the fuck alone, man, Willie Nelson is a legend....”
– Snoop Dogg in reference to Willie Nelsons recent arrest for marijuana possession
November 2010
